The Secrets to Life

Mike has this theory ... He believes that babies are born knowing all the secrets of life. And if you've ever seen one of those babies who looks at you with his or her big, all-knowing eyes, unblinking as you make stupid decision after stupid decision, then you know what I mean when I say "old souls". His theory is this: Babies are born knowing everything, but they have to choose: have the knowledge or have the ability to articulate it. So he's been pretty concerned that while he's in Reno, El will lose her access to the secrets ... and he'll miss that transition phase. Thankfully, even though she has cut two teeth since he left, she hasn't intentionally used any words (yet). She says a lot of these, though:

• mamamamamamama



• buddah buddah buddah (wishful thinking has me believing this is her version of 'brother')



• Hey (yes, hey ... I'm not sure if it's intentional, but she's been repeating hey for months now)



• and most recently .... dadadadada ... she says this most often as she's making motorcycle sounds & drooling spit down her front. It's pretty great.

And that DJ ... oh my. His "lovey" is a stuffed Spot (from Dr. Suess' Put Me In the Zoo) and it has recently become something he can't live without. He's been to daycare 2x this week & neither day did he take a nap because he says, "Spot isn't enough - I need you, Mommy". And he wrote Mike an e-mail this week that said in part, "I'm having fun with just my mommy and eelly", as if we're the last 3 people on earth (which it sometimes feels like it is) ...



Just making note of the little things ... oh, the little things ...

Liberal: To Be or Not to Be

I can't really say what I want to say better than this, so I'm posting a quote from one of my all-time favorite shows, The West Wing. This is by far not my favorite episode, but I think it's one of the single best stand-alone quotes from the entire series ... it's from the Episode The Debate and this is the response of Sen. Matt Santos (D) to Sen. Arnie Vinick (R):

... "What did liberals do that was so offensive to the Republican Party? I'll tell you what they did. Liberals got women the right to vote. Liberals got African-Americans the right to vote. Liberals created Social Security and lifted millions of elderly people out of poverty. Liberals ended segregation. Liberals passed the Civil Rights Act, the Voting Rights Act. Liberals created Medicare. Liberals passed the Clean Air Act, the Clean Water Act. What did Conservatives do? They opposed them on every one of those things, every one. So when you try to hurl that label at my feet, 'Liberal,' as if it were something to be ashamed of, something dirty, something to run away from, it won't work, Senator, because I will pick up that label and I will wear it as a badge of honor."

I won't get into my politics here - suffice it to say that I'm more liberal than many of my friends and more conservative than many of my friends. Carey & Will have this coffee mug (which I've tried - unsuccessfully - to steal) it says: If you want justice, work for peace ... Just sitting here, thinking things, thinking things ...

No, nothing has happened today, specifically, to set me on this topic - it's just somethinhg about which I think of & on often. Am I doing anything to work for justice, to work for peace, fairness, for others? I don't know ... I hope & pray that I'm raising two children who will work for those things, who will make a difference - be it in word, deed, song, art, a laugh, a smile, a hug ...

So now I've wetted your appetite - go out & buy The West Wing ... cheer for the Bartlett administration, for Josh & Donna, for C.J Cregg ... ahh ... my friends ... and for more quotes from WW ... you know the drill ...

Fireworks & Magic

I'm looking forward to Friday, the 4th of July ... to see DJ enjoying the magic of fireworks, to cooking out with my parents and El's first holiday experience. But first ...

I have to get through the magic of this week. El has a cold - nothing worse, really, than your baby being sick. Her nose is runny, her eyes are crusty, she's got that junk-in-my-throat-can't-get-it-out cough and she's having a terrible time resting. But she still lights up when she sees me, or DJ, or especially my Dad (who she has wrapped quite securely around her sweet fingers). Her bottom two front teeth have come through just enough that when she laughs, you can see them poking through. Is that not more than a little magic? DJ is slimming up - losing that chunky babiness in his face, his tummy, his legs ... everyday I see more of the little boy, the young man ... Catherine Newman, who writes this great blog called Bringing Up Ben & Birdy wrote that (& I'm paraphrasing here) one of the saddest things about being a parent is that everyday you have to say good-bye to the person your child is today so that you can say hello to the child he/she is tomorrow ... Never has that been more true than now, I think, when it's so obvious that everyday they are re-inventing themselves. Be it in their dreams (artist, song-singer, fireman, teenager, cell-phone user, teacher ...) or in the their smile, still more gums than teeth, but brighter, more inviting, more mischevious, more everything with each day that passes, coming closer to the the people they are growing up to be. Thrilling, exciting, terrifying to not only bear witness but to help mold, to guide ... to be there for the laughs, for the tears ... magic or miraculous?

You know, six years and some days ago, Mike and I exchanged vows in a small-ish church where our family and friends bore witness. We promised, among other things, to be each other's best friend, forsake all others, and of course, the in sickness & in health, for richer or poorer parts ...
And even though both of us wanted children, I don't think either of us considered what exactly those vows would mean down the road ... but on weeks like this (which, Mike, I don't care to repeat without you!), when things are going so fast, when our babies are growing up to be the people we've imagined/dreamed/hoped they'd be, when there are sniffles and coughs and laughs and weepy moments (mine & theirs) ... fireworks, fairy dust, magic wands ...even the magic of Hogwarts can't touch the magic that's sleeping down the hall or snuggling right next to me ... I'm so thankful that not knowing what the future held, we took that leap of faith in each other so that we could be here (2,000 miles apart), never having been more sure that I married my best friend and I can't wait to be old with him (well, he'll be old, I'll still be 8 years younger ...)

Sparklers, roman candles, bottle rockets ... pomp & circumstance is nothing next to this kind of magic.

... as you seek so shall you find ... ahh yeah

Runaround, Sister Hazel