This life of mine is going at twice the speed of light. Is that even possible? I stink at physics (and all other sciences, truth be told). Be it possible or not, it's true.
Two months ago, I was a high school student. I was carrying a pillow to first block to sleep through Chemistry (a hint at why I stink at sciences?) and only concerned with Volleyball or the next trip I'd take with my youth group.
A month ago I was a college student, standing outside my Senior Seminar English, watching planes crash in to the World Trade Center buildings and then the Pentagon. I was terrified that this could happen in my country (but never stopped to think of the countries where suicide bombs are the everyday-norm). And then I was awed as the people of our country wrapped themselves not in fear, but in Truth.
Three weeks ago I was expecting my first child. Terrified that I would break him, or hurt him in some fundamental way.
A week ago I was expecting my second child. Terrified that I would break her, or hurt her in some fundamental way.
My life continues to change, to go so fast that most of the time I feel like I'm on the merry-go-round, being turned faster and faster and faster until I can't hold on any longer. I know that I'm going to be thrown off and have no say in where I land or how hard.
But today. Today I am almost 30. Today I am the wife of my best friend. Today I am the mother of two of God's greatest works of art, and still terrified that I will hurt them in some fundamental way. Today I will go to sleep with a full tummy, in a warm bed. Today I will rest easy, not because of who our country has elected to lead us for the next four years, but because no matter where I go, what I do, how fast the merry-go-round is spinning, "The LORD my God will be with me wherever I go ..." (Joshua 1:9).
I blinked and Halloween was here and gone, election day was over (DJ voted for the "first time" at school!), as El went on her first pony ride ... oh, it goes so fast ... but it's so much more than o.k., no matter how fast it goes.
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
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